I need a break that isn't wasted by distractions. I don't feel like I've really been able to really think about things for a while, and even when I have time to think... I end up wasting time instead. Thoughts on hand:

- Things that ticked me off this week: the tsunami. "pearl harbor" remarks about the tsunami. infamous ucla girl. this wikileaks cable. video of a bahrain protestor who had the back of his head blown off. (this one made me sick to my stomach.)
I don't comment often about stuff happening in the news, because I find that half of the time the news ****ing pisses me off.

- Still not thinking about the future yet, except that it scares me because I don't really know what I want right now. ultimate job-wise.

- At the moment I feel like I'm over school, but nowhere near over learning yet. however, it feels like school is interfering with what I want to learn right now... actually, I just want to catch up on classes, but my schedule itself is somewhat interfering with that. -_-

- For whatever the reason I have been feeling averse to worship lately. or maybe just the majority of worship songs. I think I mentioned before that I don't really enjoy worship songs the same way I usually enjoy music in that I don't like listening to the original artists who composed the song performing them. Most of what I liked about worship was hearing it in a more personal setting - only nowadays, I'm finding it harder to enjoy even that anymore.

- I am not in the mood to talk to people when they are engaged in other things, although I am very much guilty of this myself.

- Having personal issues with being sure of anything anymore. It struck me how much there is that I don't actually know, that ought to influence how I see things.

- I'm in the middle of one of those low seasons in the semester right now, which is why everything sounds so dreary. It feels kinda comparable to (not that I would know how it would actually feel like) that moment when the disciples were panicking in that boat in the storm while Jesus was sleeping in it. And then he wakes up, chastises the wind and the waves, and asks the disciples, "Where is your faith?"

I am more or less waiting for that moment right now, because presently I'm having trouble seeing past a bunch of long-term future junk. But otherwise, day-to-day life is actually all right.